(My latest kitchen toy)I've always enjoyed cooking but when I was pregnant....the smell of food had me laid out for the night. For 6 weeks after losing Areila I couldn't eat.... It started in the hospital...I remember listening to my family and midwife go on and on about how I "needed to eat" but I just couldnt. I just COULD NOT eat....other than a graham cracker or carrot here and there. I don't know how I didn't pass out...I don't know what kept me going. I'm here to tell you....a person can live a VERY long time w/o food! I still have difficulty with eating but I do it....I make sure to eat dinner with the family.
Yeah...I've got a diet for you....It's called the 'dead baby diet'. Your whole fucking life gets turned upside down, and all sense of control and security is taken away....and your left with total emptiness....does wonders for the figure. I probably lost 40lbs (baby weight included)the first 2 months and another 15+ in the following 2 months. My evil aunt who didn't even send a condolence card made it a point to tell me "how good I looked....sorry for your loss but you look really, really good." REALLY....thanks...so, I guess it was worth losing a child so I could get back down to my high school weight...huh? FUCK OFF. I'd gladly be even 100lbs heavier if it meant I could have my breathing, living, healthy baby back in my arms!
(Eggplant and ricotta rolls with roasted Asparagus...mmmm)
(Summer Rattatouille)
(Coq au Vin---good schtuff)So, back to food.... I began cooking...again. I spend A LOT of time cooking. It's totally cathartic for me. I get in my zone, put on a little Krishna Das....and cook. When I'm REALLY stressed I cook LONG meals....like Indian. Indian food takes a very long time to prepare and cook and my family LOVES Indian.
(Pulao, Chicken Tikka Masala, grilled eggplant and fried bananas) 
(I cook and Larry cleans the kitchen---poor guy...this is what happens when I cook Indian)
(Again, poor guy)
I've also been working on perfecting my cupcakes with booze recipes. Southern comfort, Strawberry Margarita, and Coconut~Rum.....
(Again, poor guy)I've also been working on perfecting my cupcakes with booze recipes. Southern comfort, Strawberry Margarita, and Coconut~Rum.....
Wow! This all looks fantastic! I lost a ton of weight at first too. It's funny how depression manifests so differently though at various points. At first I couldn't eat, then eating became a comfort thing to me. So now I am fat as hell and feel prego again even though I'm not. UGH. After my csection I was TINY. People couldn't believe I just had twins. (Well, that, and only having one baby to show for it...) I hate cooking. I think it's a self esteem thing. I feel incompetent.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, all your pix look awesome, and I'd love to sample your foods. We should have a BLM dinner and all bring something (I will do my best lol).